How To Get Someone Back
Winning your ex back may not be as difficult as keeping them once you’ve won them back. But that’s a different story. First, we want to concentrate on how to get someone back.
Techniques may vary depending on who left who. If you gave your ex the boot and have now decided you made the wrong decision, you will have to take a more humble approach. After all you were the one to break-off the relationship.
If you were booted by your ex and still want them back, do not beseech them. You don’t want them to think, “this reminds me of why I left so-and-so in the first place!”
This article has five tips to get you going on the road to reunited bliss. It’s important to have guidelines or a plan to follow since your emotional state is probably quite vulnerable at this point. You want to put your best foot forward and give it all you got, within reason of course.
Hopefully the following tips will help you get your ex back. The term “hopefully” is used loosely here because there are no guarantees! Every person has a will, and if you say “you will” and your ex says, “they won’t”…well you get the picture. But hey, be positive. Shoulders back, chin up, and let’s go.
Five Tips On How To Get Someone Back
Put Yourself in their Shoes
This may seem odd, but really think about it. Picture yourself as your ex and put yourself in their shoes. Now, if you wanted you back and knowing your characteristics, your likes and dislikes, how would you go about it? The aphorism “treat others how you want to be treated” works well here. You would want the person to be respectful, patient, understanding, and sensible. Be that with your ex as well. Your approach should not be strictly emotional but intelligent as well. See yourself as “them” and work from there.
Let Go of the Past
Regardless of who initiated the break-up and who did the most damage in the relationship, you will have to let go of the past. ONLY talk about the past insofar as it is necessary for rekindling your broken relationship. If your ex walked away from the relationship, it could be for a number of reasons. Don’t blame them or yourself for stuff that is dead and gone. It happened and there’s little you can do to change it.
However, you can change how the two of you interact “right now.” If apologies are in order, make an apology. Talk about how you would still like to have a future with your ex and how you would be keen on having them as your “current” partner. If they want to bring up any past issues let them, and be objective, dont argue about them. Focus on how things can be for the two of you. You will have to have the “patience of a saint” to pull this off, but you can do it.
This tip is basically self-explanatory. There are certain things you need to do and shun to get your ex back. For goodness sake, maintain your dignity. Seeming to desperate or begging is a BIG turn-off. Do you want someone to come back to you because they feel sorry for you? This will only backfire later anyways. Be calm, mature, and clear. NICELY communicate to your ex that you believe the relationship can still work.
Forget the Games
If you think you can win your ex back by making them jealous, pretending to be dating someone else, sending anonymous emails to their account, you know, all those little childish amusements that even children don’t have time for. Don’t do it!
Don’t Plead the Fifth
If your ex gave you the business about how you were lacking in some way in your relationship, did you consider what they said? Maybe you used to wear earplugs when you made love, who knows, it could be anything! The point is, don’t tell your ex how you’ve changed, show them. Actions speak louder than words, so just do it!
Keeping It Real
Do your best without over doing it. You can’t “make” someone take you back. If they really don’t want to meet you halfway, it’s the signal to move on with your life. Fate has a way of tidying up our messes. Remember, you will recover and comeback even stronger.